Religion of Health

Is the argument by my intellectual self that this is bad for me, reason enough not to do something I love?


We have become a society who’s collective religion is health. Let’s ignore the fact that during my lifetime EVERYTHING has been on the “good for you” and “bad for you” list, including cigarettes, which were considered good for you for a while. It is a self-righteous thing to see your choices as the only virtuous and reasonable choices to make.

For me personally, I’m done with the guilt. Or at least I have a personal goal to stop feeling guilty. Who is to say how we should live our lives?

Eat well, exercise, avoid alcohol and other bad habits and die anyway. So what is the point?


Drunk and Stoned. Yeah!

I hooked up the control to the speakers in the burgundy room wrong. Now I have sound bleed in the family room.

I had the same panic that I had before Thanksgiving. This time there was no basis. It may just be weed that makes me feel paranoid.

Today’s top stories are:

Mommy in the front yard

Taras is he gay?

Weight or wait?

My non-invincibility


Measures of accountability

Sex thoughts. Am I an erotica writer?

Blogging, Life Coaching

Trying to Avoid Aversion

My title is clearly a contradiction, just saying…

My roommate just told me another story about how awful it is at work. I can’t argue, but I am thinking about it less. They say you become more like the people you spend time with. I hate to believe I am seeing the world through upset and indignation.

My focus more and more is on how I can actually have an impact on my world. Like the patent I put in. Why tangle our brains with the latest fear or divisiveness? Why wallow in upset, indignation and self-righteousness?

If we direct our attention to what we can impact, our own lives, we can use our talents to make the lives of others better. This does not need to be grandiose. If you are friendly, be friendly to everyone, for instance.

So yeah, the drama at work was someone used the microwave to cook food. Apparently, people did not like the smell. Sounds racist to me. I just don’t want to be living in the space of judgement, hate and fear anymore.


Fear of On-line Dating

The opposite of fear. A relaxing fireplace. Feels calm and cozy even in a photo.

My first reaction is fear. Or perhaps it was that initial stress headache. Either way, it is difficult for me to not immediately think of these guys as dangerous.

I slipped up. I meant to block my phone and forgot. Not the best moment in my otherwise great day. Now he’s been texting me all day. Not my idea of fun.

He actually asked what my favourite colour was. Seriously? I can’t even begin to imagine how inane I appear myself.

My first flurry of hits was because a photo of me and my daughter was centered as the main photo and I was largely cropped out.

So, I will try to relax into the process. Chill the fuck down!! I hate it when I yell at myself. But I know I’m right.

I finally told him clearly not to contact me anymore tonight. That would be valuable early screening. If he didn’t respect my wishes he’d be easy to block completely. It felt good to know I was still in control of the situation, despite my bafoo.


Fear of Happiness?

My daughter and I went to a paint night. This is what I brought home. It was fun and entertaining.

Wednesday scared me a little. The energy, focus, and joy of living I experienced overwhelmed me. I’ve become reluctant to meditate, but I will keep the promise I made to myself. Five for six weeks.

Interesting… I had a great day and it was so unfamiliar it frightened me a little. That is worth a little deconstructing.



So I noticed this weekend there did not seem to be any of the “poof…dead” public service announcements. It matters not the reason.

IMG_7008I have not received a letter back. I have no information about how long the original contract was supposed to last. These are the quantitative ways you can judge whether or not my letter had an impact.

I explained to the radio station that I used the radio to create a mood. It becomes part of my community. You go to get a good vibe and this PSA is harshing my mellow. What type of mood are you trying to create, I asked?

All I know for sure is that it is gone for now. If it repeats over the next few months, I’ll have to eat crow. But raven; and yes I use crow and raven interchangeably, there are way too many memories intermingled to figure out if it was a crow or raven involved and I sometimes even call them the big black birds.

But I digress, raven is my totem animal, which seems suiting in this context. It does not show up with a message or a reminder, they are around all of the time and they have taught me many things, like true love exists. But that’s another story.

I put out a request for peace and it was answered right away. Some of the fear mongering has been eliminated from my life. Thank-you.


Fear Mongering

My current drum is fear mongering. One if the items in queue, it should’ve likely never been shared, but I didn’t do it publicly on social media, I wrote them a letter. Writing a letter is an old standby when things are important enough to share. Like you still get a hard copy from your lawyer, or at least a copy eventually. IMG_6618

I am tired of the use of fear in our society. We are all scared to death of dying. I’ve written about this before, but the truth is, all that our scientists are doing is saying, these people died. They died from A, B and C. A, B and C are caused from this so we had better avoid this at all costs.

It sounds compelling until you realize that until we eradicate death, the “cause” of it has not been eliminated despite how we act. For instance, if you have ever had a baby, you will be familiar with this type of revelation. It goes something like this.

She was overdue and labour wouldn’t start. Then, she ate a burrito and her labour started. If you want your labour to start you should eat a burrito too. Feel free to replace the word “burrito” with your current version of the story. My favourites are “sex”, “spicy foods”, “a bumpy car ride” and of course, going for a walk which might be the most boring and difficult of the suggestions at that stage of pregnancy.

Truth is, most labours start because it is the end of a pregnancy. Yes, nine months of pregnancy usually brings on labour. And while labour is not as certain as death, we use the same kind of reasoning. He died of a heart attack. She had a stroke. These things used to be called “natural causes”, now they are conditions that should be managed, at all costs, because we believe if we eliminate these diseases we will eliminate death. It hasn’t happened yet.

So why all of the fear? The letter I wrote was to the local radio station. Yes, I am one of the hold outs that listens to the radio. Unfortunately, they are now running public safety announcements that go like this. It is a lovely day…poof you end up in the hospital. I usually have the radio shut off by now because I am tired of being manipulated by fear messages. So I don’t know what the message attached to this bit of fear is.

I doubt my letter will have an impact, but I believe we have to step up and let the powers that be know how tired we are of the fear messages. I can be sitting warm, comfortable, healthy and well fed and the messages our media brings are all about death and terror. Yes, there is bad stuff happening in the world. Why do I need to feel that it is all personally happening to me, all of the time?