A Year

It is coming up on a year. Now I realize why I started this blog was to find my authentic voice. So I’m back to blogging more regularity. Truth is, I’m loving my life and I enjoy many aspects, so I like to write about the minutiae. Like coincidences, manifestation and gratitude and how I’ve come to see how the teachings of Vipassana resonated so well with my experiences.

I believe they call it the Dharma of things. Those moments, when it is perfectly clear, that there has been an interference with your life. I can feel the teachings rewriting how I would word some things. There is no doubt they are having an impact on how I see the world.

As told in a story about pudding, take the little black stone out and enjoy the pudding. I have a little black stone, pile. Especially the bits about no sensual pleasures and giving up my shit–renouncing it is called. But there is a core truth there. I’ve always believed that at our own core we know right from wrong. Getting in touch with how your actions come in contact with your own body, there is a new understanding that you receive directly from yourself.

By focusing on your body sensations you learn to connect with your own intuition. Even as I write now, I can feel the sensations that I feel while meditating. It has a comforting, whole body, feel. I have already encountered the importance of paying attention to your body as taught by Martha Beck. She teaches the “body compass” as a tool to use on yourself to point to your North Star. By paying attention to the sensations in your body you can learn how it speaks to you through pain, contraction, openness and other sensations.

So I’m intrigued. I’ve promised myself I’ll meditate at least 5 times a week, for six weeks and decide then. In the mean time I’m going to keep writing about how these teachings fit with what I already know and practice. To truly understand one must experience Vipassana with a group.  But it is not for the faint of heart. It is a long and gruelling process. I stayed because I promised myself in advance that I would stay. But otherwise I considered leaving every other day. Especially when I realized I could go home and have an entire weekend, with no one expecting anything of me. It was difficult to stay.

These centres are financed only through donations given after you have completed a ten day course. It gives you the opportunity to give someone else the experience you had. My understanding is that you go away and when you can assess how you’ve benefited you pay it forward. So I’m in that space when I know the teachings are having an impact and I’m awaiting my assessment. Then I’ll give money in Dana.


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