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Imaginary Man

Last night, I described how I asked myself why I was still fat and I burst into tears. Several ways to interpret it, but I’m trying to get in touch with my body not analyze it to death. Sophie is barking. I’ll be right back.

I let her out long enough for her to realize that it is still raining.IMG_6748

Where was I? Awe yes, Russell Crowe. Yesterday, I came to tears when I asked myself what was going on? Those are the facts, mam. Just the facts.

I also cried later. If I consider the possibility that there is a man for me that wouldn’t just cause me more work. How would that look? I began to imagine he was standing at the stove, stirring the mushrooms. Not only did I not have to worry about dinner, it was already half made and he was taking care of the rest.

A flood of relaxation washed over me and I wanted to be near him. I walked over to the stove and threw my arms around this imaginary person I had designed to help me through this visualization. He did not really have form, just a presence. His features and build were unclear. That was not the important part of this visualization.

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