I experienced a brief flash beyond the curtain, driving down a forested area on a country road, on a sunny morning. The clouds and light cast shadows across the road and the light appeared to flicker as I drove by.
I was overwhelmed by love and joy and connection. And some bitchy part of myself pulled me back quickly reminding me that I needed to stay in my body while I was driving the car. My first response was gratitude that I had safely returned to the car that was still on the road. It was followed immediately by loss. Loss of that wondrous feeling. But I was radiating love myself from the experience.
The bit, the part I didn’t want to start with, is when I arrived at my destination, I heard about the planes crashing into the buildings in New York. I had felt it. I hadn’t known what I was feeling, but it was pure love and connection.
We all went home that day. I forced my daughters to stay in the living room with me all evening. I was petrified that we were at the start of World War III. My understanding of the events from the perspective of this world was much different from my experience of the release, love and freedom before I knew what was going on.
But I felt love. I experienced a glimpse of the other side. What is it about death that scares us so badly? It is the one inevitability of being here. If it was that bad, we wouldn’t have agreed to be here. And yes, I think we chose to experience this. I like to think of it as a three D video game, or whatever that would be called now a days.